Are you ready to leave burnout and overwhelm behind and make 2023 your best year yet? Here are 11 powerful life coaching tips you should try to ensure you are taking good care of yourself and getting one step closer to your dream life.
So, if you've been feeling down lately, unsure of yourself, failing to keep up, or having trouble reaching your goals, we have just the thing for you.
Tip #1: Invite joy into your life
Happiness isn't something you chase after or find. Happiness is what you create for yourself and invite into your life.
The purpose of life is to be joyful.
So do the things that get your happy hormones (Serotonin, Dopamine, Endorphins, Oxytocin) going. Do something you love. You'll be surprised how little you need to find that mood boost or burst of joy and peace. It could be as walking, a walk or cuddling with your dog, or enjoying the breeze.
The key is to be mindful. Stay in the present. Embrace whatever you are doing entirely and do it purposefully.
For sustained happiness, add some rituals to your daily routine. It could be anything you want!
- Affirmations in front of the mirror
- An exercise routine
- A peaceful evening routine for better sleep
- Meeting friends for a relaxed evening
- Spending some time in nature
- Playing with your kids or pets
- Meditation and breathwork
If you can only do some of them, do some. If you can't spend much time on them, block just 15-20 min a day. A little effort will give you exponential gains.
So, what are you waiting for? Get started on inviting joy into your life!
Tip #2: Create your story vision and plan for it
The world works at a breakneck speed, and getting lost in the thousand demands on your time and attention is easy. In trying to chase one goal, you may be neglecting equally important others. And that could lead to burnout, dissatisfaction, and even anger!
So, first, create your story vision - your why.
- What is the kind of life you want to live?
- What are the various facets that motivate you? Drive you?
- Visualize that life clearly. How does that make you feel?
Here's the thing, none of us are one-dimensional. We must pay equal attention to multiple facets of our life – health, career, relationships, etc.
Follow the Wheel of Life life coaching tool to figure out where you are today and where you want to be.
Once you have an idea of your ideal state, map out clearly defined realistic goals.
Realistic goals are easier and faster to achieve. They keep you focused and help you stay motivated with micro wins.
Tip #3: Be grateful
Everyone has ups and downs; how you respond to those makes all the difference.
Instead of feeling sad over what you don't have, why not appreciate, and feel gratitude for what you do have?
One of the world's renowned experts on gratitude, Robert Emmons, says you can increase your happiness by almost 25% by practicing gratitude.
That's amazing, isn't it?
But what if life really sucks? What if you can't figure out what to be grateful for?
Well, it doesn't have to be a big thing. Start with a cup of tea or coffee. Hold the warm mug in your hand and be thankful for all you have, even the tea, its smell, the feel of it going down your throat, and spreading its warmth.
Be grateful before any of your meals. Thank those who made it possible for the meal to reach your plate, starting with the farmer and ending with the cook. Stop for a moment and think how fortunate you are to have healthy food every day.
Practice gratitude daily by creating a gratitude journal - before going to bed every night, write down a list of five things for which you're grateful. Over time you'll find your life transformed!
Tip #4: Boost your self-worth
Self-worth starts with self-awareness.
- Who are you?
- What are your deepest desires?
- What is it that motivates you?
- What is it that you shine it?
- What do you love about yourself?
Spend some time on self-reflection. Spend some time with yourself. Get to KNOW yourself.
Get to know yourself better with these powerful life coaching questions.
Once you know who you are, your path in life becomes more evident, the choices you need to make become simpler, and the clutter in your mind space reduces.
When you are clear in your mind, you find flow; things seem to come together better, and your confidence increases. You get comfortable in your skin, your choices, and the pace you want to go in life.
Tip #5: Attract your tribe
There's a popular saying amongst salespeople that goes:"If you wish to sell to everyone, then you can sell to no one."
Though we aren't talking about sales, it's another way of saying that if you want to attract everyone, you attract no one.
In your lifetime, you'll meet many people; some will make you happy, some will inspire you, and some may demoralize you.
What type of people would you like to invite into your life?
- The ones that make you happy
- The ones who help you grow
- The ones who inspire you to reach your fullest potential
- The ones who celebrate with you
- The ones who don't judge you
- The ones who provide a safe space for you
You need to embody these qualities to attract these people to you too. They say life is a mirror; your vibe attracts your tribe.
Tip #6: Play!
Life has so much to offer! Let your hair down and embrace all of it. Have some fun! Don't be afraid or embarrassed to play.
Have you noticed how kids learn via play? Well, news flash! It's the same for adults too.
Here's what play does for you:
- Releases endorphins that reduce stress and improve mood
- Improves brain functionality and memory and stimulates the growth of the cerebral cortex
- Stimulates creativity and keeps you curious
- Keeps you feeling young and energetic
- Triggers the secretion of BDNF, a substance essential for the growth of brain cells
- Contributes to your overall well being
So, take some time out to play. Organize a game with your friends, get down and dirty with paint and mud, or just play fetch with your dog!
Tip #7: Learn to say no
Do you do this often, not saying 'no' when you should be? Just to please someone, and then lament why you did it?
We understand. Saying no can be difficult. But pause for a moment and think about what it's doing to your life.
If you find yourself stressed, overwhelmed, overburdened, and constantly firefighting, you are clearly taking on too much.
But does that mean you should refuse everything left, right, and center? Nope!
The best way to refuse things that don't align with your purpose is to understand what is important to you. You can use the Eisenhower matrix to get more clarity on this.
Important things contribute to your long-term goals but may or may not be urgent. Urgent things need your immediate attention but may not be essential to your life plan. Now here's how it helps you say no:
- Say yes and do it first if it's urgent and important
- Say yes and plan for it if it's important but not urgent
- Say no and delegate it to someone else if it's urgent but not important
Say no and eliminate it from your bucket if it's neither urgent nor important
Here are some ways in which you can say no politely:
- I generally don't work on weekends. Monday would be fine for me.
- Your offer is great. But I'm afraid I might not do justice to it as I'm loaded with work.
- I would love to come, but that day doesn't work for me.
- Thank you for your offer, but I don't think this is for me.
Tip #8: Use time wisely
The only real currency you have is your time.
The way you distribute your time decides the quality of your life.
- Are you spending too much time at work? Then your relationships might be suffering.
- Do you spend too much time catering to others' needs? Then you might be cutting down on self-care, feeling unwell, stressed, or depleted.
- Are you spending too much time doing nothing? Then you may not be contributing enough to your community.
We all come on this planet with a limited amount of time. Our lifetimes are not even blips on the radar on a universal timescale. But in that limited timeframe, we can do so much!
Hyper-tasking, distractions, and lack of planning often take away valuable time. So, think about ways in which you can optimize the way you spend your time. See how you can allot more time to do things that energize you and serve love.
Tip #9: Forgive the past, embrace the future, and live in the present
It is human nature to cling to something that's happened in the past, which cannot be reversed and gives you pain.
But you cannot make space for the new unless you let go of the old.
What has happened, has happened. Let it go!
Once you can make peace with the past, you'll realize that your past is no longer influencing your future. You will see many new opportunities available to you now!
But don't spend too much time worrying about the future either. The key is to live in the present. Live in the moment. This, here and now, is the reality. So, live that moment with all that you have! Give it your best and see the magic!
Coach yourself to let go of your past with these spiritual life coaching questions.
Tip #10: Flip the happiness gap
Very often, we set our benchmark of happiness to our achievements in the future.
"I will be happy when I get that promotion."
"I will be happy when I buy that car."
"I will be happy when my coaching business crosses a million dollars in revenue."
The problem with this is that the future goal is dynamic. It's always moving. So, when you've got the desired promotion, you want to move to the next rung on the career ladder. When you've got the car you wanted, you want the next striking model in the market, and so on.
This moving target is not making you happy or satisfied with your life. It's doing the opposite. You are chasing an imaginary idea of happiness but getting dissatisfied with life.
What you should do instead is to look back and see how far you have come. That's what will give you a sense of accomplishment and achievement.
If you started with a coaching business with barely any clients and now are doing a million dollars, that's fantastic! You don't have to worry about doing ten million next. You can bask in your (well-deserved) glory!
Tip #11: Believe in yourself
In the movie "Indiana Jones and the Raiders of the Lost Ark," Harrison Ford had to cross a gorge. Standing there, he sees no bridge, even when the map says there's one. Despite seeing nothing, he takes a step forward and finds the bridge. It had been cleverly camouflaged to make it look like the canyon itself. And we know the rest.
What does this teach us?
It is human nature to have self-doubt or fear when faced with adversity. Its source can be from various negative situations in life. The memory of these unwanted situations holds you back from believing in yourself and taking the next positive step.
But remember, this experience also makes you overcome self-doubt and win the game.
It's helpful to recall the situations that positively impacted you. The energy from the positive impact propels you and drives you forward. Recall what you have already achieved and how it made you bold and empowered you to face more challenges.
Bonus Tip: Embrace Failure
In response to a question about his failures, Thomas Edison once said, "I have not failed 10,000 times—I've successfully found 10,000 ways that will not work."
Success and failure are opposite sides of the same coin. One cannot exist without the other. Success needs a base to establish itself. The base comes from the years of experience you gather in your life, some of which may be positive and some negative. Failure is a chance to pause, think, recollect yourself, and come back stronger.
This approach to seeing failure as an opportunity to grow is rooted in the growth mindset. When you see challenges as learning opportunities, dabble in new things without fear, and accept feedback, you open yourself to growth in all areas of life. In contrast, if you see failure as the limit of your abilities, you close off all future possibilities.
It’s not to say that failure doesn't hurt. It does. And those feelings are valid.
But if you are ever struggling with failure, remember your days as a baby or look at other babies just trying to take their first steps. How often do they fall? They get bruised, cry, and then try to walk again. And they try, and try, and try till they are walking!
Life makes you fail so that you may learn the foundation for success. It's like a tool in the hands of a master sculptor, who chisels away the excess and creates a beautiful sculpture. It is nature's way of telling you… failure is okay; it will only make you stronger to be successful. Nothing in life is permanent. Bad times come, only to make way for a brighter tomorrow.