CHAPTER 2
Executive Coaching Principle #2: Become Fearless
Top-level entrepreneurs and experts don't get to where they are by playing it safe.
They are risk-takers.
In a world where most people look for approval and validation before making a single decision (including what they want to have for dinner)...
In a world where most people allow their fear, doubt and anxiety to override their passion and purpose...
The most successful leaders and executives go charging toward their goals no matter how they feel and they don't let anything get in the way of hitting their mark.
They are willing to push the ticket, to take action and do innovative, creative and unusual things to achieve their goals.
They don't focus on what others think or say about them. They're even willing to be seen as "crazy" as long as they get to follow their dreams, their path and their passion...
And this is one of the biggest reasons why so many executives and high performers end up changing the way the world works, on their way to the top.
Just to be clear...
They're human and they struggle with these emotions just like everyone else, but most of the time, they have what it takes to motivate themselves to move forward and get things done no matter how they feel.
As a powerful executive coach, your job is to match and surpass your client's ability to be bold and brave in the face of fear.
Fearless executive coaching can happen when you can guide your clients to see the world in different ways so they can leverage their courage and their sense of purpose and passion to get to a place of deep clarity.
Becoming a fearless coach is about showing them how to see their life and their work through different lenses, so they can step outside their go-to routines, processes, and viewpoints to try something new - no matter how much these routines, processes and viewpoints have helped them achieve their goals in the past.
Exponential creativity gets triggered when your clients see the world through different lenses and this is a key ingredient to help them skyrocket past their current level of success and soar even higher.
Powerful, transformational executive coaching is about being able to overcome your personal fears of creating uneasiness in your client.
It's about getting over feeling intimidated by your client's success and achievements and getting over the fear of "not being liked."
This is so you can ask difficult questions and hold space for awkward - even painful - conversations as volatile emotions and reactions come up during sessions.
When you do this, your client will start to see what they must see about themselves - their hidden emotional and mental blocks - around their work, their life, their relationships.
Becoming fearless and getting over the need to be praised, validated or liked is one of the quickest, most effective ways to become an in demand, world-class executive coach.
Here are 3 actionable tasks you can do to cultivate courage and break away from the need for validation, praise and the need to be liked by everyone, so you can start to practice fearless executive coaching.
Fearless Task #1
One of the most successful entrepreneurs in the world, self-made billionaire Sara Blakely practices the art of courage with an unusual activity... she sings out loud while she's in an elevator with strangers.
This activity helps to release the fear of "what other people might think." It trains your brain to see that things are not as bad as they seem and even though a task or experience feels scary or embarrassing, you will survive and come out braver and more confident, on the other side.
Fearless Task #2
Another highly successful entrepreneur and best-selling author Tim Ferriss encourages an experiment where you lie flat on the ground in a public space such as a park or your favorite caf'.
The idea is to get to a place where you can hold up against curious stares and shocked looks. As with Fearless Task #1, this is to help you understand that difficult, embarrassing experiences are a lot harder to do in your mind and that
Fearless Task #3
One of the most powerful human fears is the fear of rejection and failure. You can accelerate your path to courage and to becoming a fearless executive coach when you learn to embrace failure and rejection.
Rejection trainer and author of the popular book, Rejection Proof, Jia Jiang, recommends doing tasks or making requests where you're pretty sure you'll fail. This is so you can start to become "rejection proof." Jia Jiang suggests that you try to borrow $100 from a stranger or you could ask to go behind the counter at Starbucks and try to make your own Latte.
Keep practising and requesting until you get to the place where you no longer feel afraid of getting a "no."
Chapter 1
Executive Coaching Principle #1: Get Uncomfortable
Chapter 2
Executive Coaching Principle #2: Become Fearless
Chapter 3
Executive Coaching Principle #3: Tune Into Emotions & Energy
Chapter 4
Executive Coaching Principle #4: Encourage The Moonshot
Chapter 5
Executive Coaching Principle #5: Lead Don't Follow
Chapter 6
How To Coach Executives
CHAPTER 3
Executive Coaching Principle #3: Tune Into Emotions & Energy
When it comes to world-class executive coaching, Principle #3 is where the rubber meets the road.
Top executive coaches understand that far more often than not, what a client says in a session is not as important as what a client does not say.
While executives and high performers are open to asking and receiving help, they are often afraid or anxious about being vulnerable.
This is why, as their coach, you need to get into that space of 100% focused attention with your whole self -- you need to learn to focus conscious awareness and attention on your client with your heart, mind and soul.
This will give you the ability to connect with your client's energy which is about how they feel and it allows you to tune into their hidden emotions and their overall energy.
When you master this coaching skill, you'll astound your clients with your ability to understand them on a deep level and they'll feel seen, heard, and understood.
This is exactly what you want as their coach.
You know you're creating a space of pure focused attention when you start to hear your clients say things like...
When you practice tuning into your client's energy, you're giving yourself room to absorb and process what your client is saying, feeling and thinking, and you're allowing your client to do the same for themselves.
This synergistic pattern is incredibly powerful in giving your client permission to be themselves without feeling judged and to feel safe enough to be vulnerable with you, their coach.
As every coach knows, these are the elements that lead to exponential success for clients and for coaches.
The art of tuning into emotions and energy comes with patience, practice and persistence, so whatever you do, don't push yourself or judge yourself if you don't master this skill right away.
HOW TO TUNE INTO YOUR CLIENT'S EMOTIONS & ENERGY
Here are some of the key elements to help you practice tuning into your client's emotions and energy.
Practice watching their body language, focus on the expression on their faces and how they hold themselves. Are their shoulders hunched, do they look anxious, are they frowning while sharing good news? Reflect on these little clues and start to practice getting a feel for their hidden emotion and overall energy.
Whatever happens, don't feel like you have to fill in pauses in the conversation by saying something "useful" or "smart." Learn to get comfortable with silent stretches during a coaching session. Often a client will feel naturally inspired and motivated to dig deeper and go further into their own heart and mind when you hold quiet space for them to do so.
Make sure you check your biases and judgements at the door. There is no room for your personal opinions and beliefs during a coaching session. This is your client's time to express themselves and to be heard, seen and understood in their raw, vulnerable state. Judgements will cloud this sacred space and create instant - and possibly lasting -- distrust between you and your client and it's a total deal breaker.
