March 29, 2022
Do you ever wonder how to enroll new clients with ease and confidence? Or how to start great conversations that hook potential clients in from the get-go? In today’s episode, Coach Ajit coaches life and spiritual coach Jo who struggles with...
Do you ever wonder how to enroll new clients with ease and confidence? Or how to start great conversations that hook potential clients in from the get-go? In today’s episode, Coach Ajit coaches life and spiritual coach Jo who struggles with enrolling and communicating her “why” to potential clients.
If you’ve been challenged with sales and enrolling for longer-term coaching packages, this episode is exactly what you need. Listen in on this insightful coaching session to learn the best techniques and business ideas to overcome these challenges and start enrolling clients with ease.
Coach Ajit (00:00):
You are listening to Master Coaching with Ajit podcast that inspires coaches to impact the lives of their clients more meaningfully. I am Coach Ajit and I'm known for coaching high performers, entrepreneurs, and leaders. I'm also a serial entrepreneur and author of many books. On this podcast, I am answering your burning questions. I'm also demonstrating and deconstructing behind the scenes coaching sessions.
Coach Ajit (00:35):
And in today's episode, you get to see behind the scenes, me working with a student of ours, actually, I first met Jo when she was studying in the first cohort of Certified Life Coach by Evercoach and by Mindvalley. And we got to have a conversation during the course of the program, and we kind of lean into some of the advanced ideas that sometimes you would see being referred as we are talking about in the episode. You don't need to be a Certified Life Coach to understand the ideas that we talk about because we did a good job, I think in giving context and really sharing what some of those ideas were and making sure that the episode itself stands on two feet. So don't worry about it. But it's an interesting episode because it furthers the dialogue a little bit. It also demonstrates the power of some of the ideas that we have talked about here on Master Coaching with Ajit podcast
Coach Ajit (01:26):
Like enrolling for a longer time, how does that impact your income? How does that impact your confidence? How and what to do, what to think about what can happen, even if you're enrolling really well, which is all that happens in this conversation with Jo. You will hear us talking about some challenges Jo is facing currently and you will also hear us leading into future possibilities and future challenges that she may encounter as we go through the entire coaching session. There's tons of techniques, tons of business ideas that you'll listen into. As we lean into this episode, I am so excited to bring this coaching conversation, to master coaching with podcast. So excited to hear your ratings and reviews after you listen to this episode. So without further ado, let's listen in to my conversation with Jo.
Coach Ajit (02:19):
Jo, before we get started, I'd like to kind of lean into where is where is the client at? Like, you know, just emotionally and maybe like more like where the energy is kind of like sitting. So right now, do you feel more like excited? Do you feel more anxiety? Do you feel just, you know, chill? What, where are you at?
Jo Gillard (02:41):
I feel excited. I think that I'm feeling for talking to you, this is a big privilege that you've offered to the guys on the, on the course. So it's amazing. I feel very honored to have some time in your calendar.
Coach Ajit (02:53):
Oh, absolutely. Absolutely. I'm excited to speak with you. Glad that you're excited. So we don't have to do any pre-work to kind of get you in the right head space. Uh, you're already in the right head space, what I'd love to do because we have limited time and this is kind of like we've interacted with this kind of us interacting properly, like sitting down for 45 minutes together kind of situation. Yeah. I like to set kind of an outcome that will make you feel the session was, you know, useful. And it was something that was directed towards an outcome that you want in your life or some kinda work that you would like to do. So I know you sent in some notes before, but that was like several weeks ago at this point. So why don't we start with, what would make this session really powerful for you?
Jo Gillard (03:37):
Always such a great question. And let me try and answer it in a concise way. So during the course, you opened my mind to one year coaching packages and I'm totally lent into that and I'm loving it cuz I have three beautiful humans signed up and I'm loving having the spaciousness to not have to think about when I will next fill those gaps in my diary and obviously powerful transmissions. So thank you and gratitude for that. And there's still this sense of, and I would like four more clients to enter into this container with me. And I've had a few that sniff around and I've had a few that have asked a few questions. And one thing I'm noticing is I still feel like I haven't quite got that. This is how I help you. Like this is the outcome that I help. So I feel like the, the outcome's almost like what is that winning statement that you're like, this is what I do.
Jo Gillard (04:42):
And I'm quite connected to your like top value love and, and that your serve love. And I've lent into that. And I always felt like it was that, but for me feels more like spreading the transmission of love. Like it's more of a, how can I hold a transmission and people get to be in that space and allow the energy to interact and we explore it. So the love feels like I realize this only recently, I feel like the love is actually the how so. I feel like I've been starting with the, how, instead of starting with the why long story short, I feel like the best outcome would be why not even why I'm doing it, but getting confident, expressing the why and how that is of service. Like why that is about somebody else's me caring more about them than me needing clients and that practicing, exploring how to say it.
Coach Ajit (05:38):
Mm, absolutely absolutely. Interesting question. Very interesting outcome. Let's explore first. What takes away that confidence from you? So when you're having a conversation with a client, let's say I am your client. Let's, let's do a little role play. If we have to, uh, my curiosity would be, let's say we're communicating. We are having a conversation. We're having a good conversation. And now you are at a stage where you're communicating. Why is it that it is important to you? What you do or what is it that is important to you that you do? What would take away the confidence in you sharing that with me?
Jo Gillard (06:12):
It's interesting as you say that, the thought that bubbled up for me is questioning whether my, why is not your, why? Like, I feel like that living with a feeling of aliveness, feeling like you're fully experiencing your life, that you get to show up to all of it that you get to say yes, and to experiencing all of it is extraordinary living. Right? It's powerful. And I, the, the thought that popped up when you asked me that question was, but that might not be what they're think. Like they might not actually want that. So perhaps it's asking another question instead of sharing what excites me about living a life that really feels like I lived it, like I've embraced it. Like I've enjoyed it. Like I've experienced it all. And I got to be all of who I am. You know, that full expression of who I am.
Coach Ajit (07:05):
Do you think your clients are offended or somehow concerned if you share your why while exploring opportunities for them, why do you think it is not important for a client to know your intention?
Jo Gillard (07:21):
I feel like there's perhaps an energy that shifts when I start to say it, sometimes that it feels like it's becoming selling rather than sharing.
Coach Ajit (07:34):
Do you have, uh, partnerships in life, like friendships, loving partner kids or something like that?
Jo Gillard (07:40):
I have all of the above.
Coach Ajit (07:41):
Okay, fantastic. That's awesome. Have you found yourself sharing your true purpose or whatever is your message to the world or your own personal passion with them? Do you find yourself being able to share that or you feel like I can't really share that with them.
Jo Gillard (07:56):
I definitely have close friends that I'm comfortable sharing this with and I've played with it and they've heard all iterations of this and yeah, so I, one in particular, my husband is more open to these conversations these days than he has been in the past. And my confidence in sharing, it's probably greater as well in the past. I used to introduce myself as a life and spirituality coach and, and then I'd have to try and explain what spirituality was and why I feel like that perspective is important. And I felt like I was going around and running circles a little bit describing how it had helped me open my mind and perspectives to new possibility. And my husband is very corporate focused needs to very clearly explain the outcomes to his clients. And it needs to be better, faster, cheaper, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah.
Jo Gillard (08:51):
And he's actually incredibly good at sales and marketing. But when we get into this conversation and it gets a little like, but that's not your funnel, Jo, you need to start at the top and not like, and, and my brain just switches off and goes, that's just, that's just not me. That's not just me and it. So I, I have this interesting resistance to, I feel like whenever I share it with him in particular, like I get the eye roll. I get the okay, well, whatever. That's not a business. I don't know if, yeah...
Coach Ajit (09:24):
Let's explore a little bit further when you are sharing, what is exciting? You, do you feel that your friends find themselves more connected to you or they step away from you as a person?
Jo Gillard (09:37):
I would say the friends that know me well, step closer. Most people that don't know me well, step closer when they've been invited in, in the right way, when they're like kind of a little bit like minded already, if I'm running a circle or a workshop or something, I feel like the energy people are inspired by what they have to share.
Coach Ajit (10:00):
Reason why I'm asking all these questions Jo is because you, you shared that when you are sharing what is important to you, why you do what you do, what is important in the process? You said, it feels like you're selling something, right? And I wanted to lean into that. If our friends find ourselves to get closer, because now I can align with your purpose and I can see why you do what you do. And I can see myself in that story or living that story in one another. Are you really selling or are you inspiring?
Jo Gillard (10:30):
That's true. And I hear that. And there's still this little question that's going, it's perhaps specifically more in an enrollment conversation or, or in that conversation where you're about to start talking about working together more seriously, and money becomes involved and I'm sharing a vision for what they could create and trying to make this sense of what I can envision for them and see as possibilities, feel real, knowing what I've experienced and knowing what I've seen in other clients. And yet, somehow that's where this feels less like there's a flow to it. Uh, there's like a little block there. That's just a little bit like
Coach Ajit (11:15):
The thing that we are really trying to explore here, Jo is what is that block? Because that block is, seems like to me, that if you would share your vision, you feel comfortable sharing with a friend because you're not in the frame, I'm trying to enroll. But the moment I changed the frame, even though the other person is perfectly aligned to wanting to hear your vision, you suddenly cannot find yourself saying it. You suddenly find yourself feeling challenged, feel like you're selling something versus simply stating. As a matter of fact, what is the drive? You know, when, uh, Martin Luther King Jr gave a speech that is the world famous speech, he never said, tell me your dream. He said, I have a dream. And he enrolled, of course, thousands of people into his dream, of the world. The dream was greater and it was a beautiful dream.
Coach Ajit (12:04):
And we are still working on that dream. But I had a dream was what he said. He didn't say, okay, tell me your dream. And I will align with each one of you, what your dream is. I'm not saying I am Martin Luther King, or you are Martin Luther King. Like we still have a lot of work to do to match up that amazing job that he did to start a revolution. But what I am alluding to is that there is power in our ability to get people aligned with what we believe, because when we share what we believe, it allows people to be able to see themselves in that belief. Do you see what I mean? Totally. Now that is not necessarily your challenge though. Your challenge seems like to me and, and let's explore this and see if it is actually truly your challenge or not. But the challenge that seems to me is that you have inherent resistance to terms like enrollment to terms like money. And there is some kind of a dialogue that you have around these terms or what these terms mean. Would you say that is somewhat towards direction of truth. That may be the actual thing that we need to work on today.
Jo Gillard (13:11):
Mm-hmm...I feel like there's definitely a layer of that. And as you were sharing the image of Martin Luther King Jr's speech, and I have dreamed I've written manifested before, and I have that dream and, and I know people love it. And I feel like perhaps there's also this resistance to the real dream that I'm dreaming for these clients is even bigger than where they're possibly able to see, you know, it's when they're unleashing their magic on the world. And I don't wanna frighten them by what's possible either. You know what I mean? Like, oh, I think you're gonna start that foundation and you're gonna change these people's lives. And like, people might be like, oh, it's too much too soon. I can't do that. And yet in five years, maybe they can, but yes, let's keep playing with their resistance because you're so absolutely right. That that's, that's really, is there that really still is there.
Coach Ajit (14:08):
We're gonna lean into that in a, in a hard second, let's talk about what you just shared is where is it where we, as coaches need to draw the line of what is scary for our clients and what is not scary for our clients? Where do you think that line is?
Jo Gillard (14:24):
That's a great reflection because how could I ever know where that line is for my client? Only they can know where that line is, right?
Coach Ajit (14:33):
Even, they don't know where that line is. And that is why they have a coach to explore the line. But if I, as a coach define your fear, and define where you can stop and how much you can take and what you can't take. Am I giving power to you or taking away power from our coaching relationship?
Jo Gillard (14:51):
Yeah. Taking it. Interesting. So interesting
Coach Ajit (14:56):
It's something to reflect on. And where is it that we get to say that our clients can or cannot dream? If we can share a dream or cannot share a dream, if we can work with a client to build that dream, if it is to come through them, right? Because we also don't wanna lay our dreams on them because that's our dream, not theirs. Right. We gotta bring it out with them, work with them to bring it out, right? And that, to be very honest is the best enrollment process that you can have is to help somebody really know what their dreams are, because when you help somebody really realize their dreams, they get to go, oh, there is more potential than I had ever imagined myself. Maybe I need to talk to this person more so I can keep leaning into it.
Jo Gillard (15:40):
Yes. And interestingly, I've had more than one client that had big dreams and we didn't keep working together. So I don't know if they ended up some definitely did, cuz I've stayed in touch and you hear about the things that have unfolded. Um, but there's a couple that had really big ones that they weren't even anchored. They weren't going on vision boards yet. They were just these things that got expressed as these random ideas, almost of visions. And it would've been so magical to keep working with them longer term and, and just see how those seeds started to take hold the roots and yeah. Yeah. Love that.
Coach Ajit (16:16):
One of the keys to work with clients that we love working with and the clients that will continue to love working with you is to not enroll them in working with us and is to enroll them in working on their dreams. And that is our job is to enroll them into saying, if you're confident, that is your dream, how about we get you to work on it? And that's when they hire the coach, right? We get too attached to the idea that we are enrolling this person. You're not enrolling this person into anything you're enrolling or helping the person enroll in their own dreams. That is what coaching is. Coaching is you supporting someone achieve what they wanna achieve and already in their lives to take away those limitations in the way and go, okay, let's take that away. Here is how we all do that. Here is let's take this other limitation away. And as you take away, all those limitations, soon enough, you find that the person has actually achieved the dream or at least have moved towards it. Right now let's explore the whole idea of enrollment because we are talking about it anyways. And that seems to be one of your challenges or concerns or areas where you kind of like doubt what you're really doing. What is enrollment for you? What do you think enrollment means?
Jo Gillard (17:26):
Well, enrollment is taking a potential client through a conversation to explore what it is that they're most wanting to evolve into, grow into transform change to the point where they actually say yes, like to me, the enrollment is the yes. Rather than the call that you may have with lots of people that aren't ready or don't say yes, enrollment means, yes, I'm ready to work on my dreams with you.
Coach Ajit (17:55):
Okay. That is the right answer to give. Now tell me the real answer of what enrollment really means for you. What really shows up for you when you say enrollment, because if that was the answer and that is the truth, and that is your truth, what are you resisting? Like there's nothing to resist in that you're enrolling them in their own dreams. What's there is nothing that you are asking as Jo of them. What truly is enrollment for you? Let's get honest about it. What does that mean? What does it show up for you? How does it feel like when you say I'm enrolling someone?
Jo Gillard (18:22):
No, I feel like actually that having a system, what that system is, I feel unclear about. And I guess I have a little bit of self-doubt as to what that might look like, but you're absolutely right. This is, that's where the attention in my business needs to go. And it's, I guess it's feeling into what would be the most fun and enjoyable way for me to start conversations where I feel enthusiastic about asking people what's going on for them. Having meaningful conversations. Yeah.
Coach Ajit (18:52):
Yeah. Well, I'm gonna give you one thing that will happen a hundred percent. It happens with everyone. Who's finding a system and that's why I'm kind of like, without even you actually exploring it, I'm giving you a footnote before to remember. So when we are building a business, we never wanna find the system. First, what we wanna do is we wanna create action first. And it is because if you've ever worked on your health goals, it's, I'm using health goals is because it's very personal to everyone, right? If you ever work on your health goals, you'll find that you'll find something that you think works. You' take it. You'll be very highly motivated about it. And about a month to two months as, or sometimes even sooner, you'll find your high motivation goes into a big dip. Right? And the reason why it goes into a big dip is because you're trying to systemize something that you fully don't understand just yet.
Coach Ajit (19:36):
Right? That's why it goes into a dip because what it tends to happen is you're like, oh, this is awesome. It's working. And then you realize that it actually is naturally congruent with your body or not really congruent with your soul or naturally congruent with your environment. And so you go for a big dip, right? And then it's really hard to come back from the dip. The only way you can come back from the dip is habits and systems, right? So what you wanna be mindful of when you're doing something new in your business is be aware that the dip can happen. And that's absolutely okay. What you have to remember is that's the hard part, the hard part is not to get started. Getting started is actually easier to get past that dip is probably one of the hardest things that you will do, right? Because that's where you feel like everything's fails, right? Has that happened to you in business where you started something super strong and a month or two months in, you were like, ah, this is not gonna work.
Jo Gillard (20:24):
A hundred percent. Yeah.
Coach Ajit (20:27):
That's the dip. That's where you're like, oh, it's not working. It's not that it's not working your motivation when for a tasks. And the system that you thought was the system was just an exploration at that point wasn't system. Just yet the clarity that I just presented of my system is not something I started with. That's the point I got to where I know exactly how many events I have to do. If I need to do enrollments, how many conversations I need to do, if I'm looking to enroll, the reason I'm so specific about it is because I built that over three to five years. Right? So I had my dip where I was like, oh, it's not working. I'm doing all these different things. I've sent out emails sometimes for people to be able to book me as a coach and it bombs. So I was like, I have had those moments that I'm sure you have had in your life.
Coach Ajit (21:10):
And anybody that's listening to this podcast has had where they've gone. And they're like, this is not working. Everything I'm trying is absolutely not working. Right. And that is where you need to, that's where you need to find new systems. It's like, okay, this is the worst stage, right? Where I feel like nothing's working, what is working at this point? Like, what is it that I am really actually still excited about, even when I'm feeling low and then you build a system from there because that, system's what you'll actually keep. You will not keep the other excited system that I said on a podcast, because I don't know Jo well enough to really know what our system's gonna be. I'm just taking something you said and turning it around and saying, Hey, maybe this will work. Right. But Jo is the only person that knows what's gonna work.
Coach Ajit (21:50):
So Jo's gotta throw something in the air. But the intention is not just throw on many things in the air and then hope something sticks. It's more like let's throw one in the air. Let's find out, is this working? Oh, this is not working for me because let's, it's not energetically aligned. It's not solar aligned. It feels too much work. It doesn't feel like the right energy or this is perfect. I've found the system. Great. Let's go. Let's double down. And even if I'm experiencing a little bit of a dip, I'm gonna work on it to build a consistent habit around it. And once I've built it out, the system will be perfect. One day, one day. Right. It doesn't have to happen immediately. So that's the first part. Do you think you could take the next 30 days or 60 days to try and discover a system?
Coach Ajit (22:32):
And do you think if you find that system, as you explore this, your challenge, because you said challenge is not enrollment, you don't feel challenged when you're in a conversation. You don't find resistance when you're making an offer. Your resistance is to get people on the phone call, right. In, in sales, it'll be called prospecting is your challenge. Okay. In my kind of, uh, conversations in enrollments, it'll be called, how do you start a conversation? Right? Because we are not trying to enroll anyone in anything. We are just trying to have conversations, good, meaningful, deep conversations. And when it is time for the right person, we are simply inviting someone to enroll into their own dreams. It's a little bit different than sales. People think coaching is itself is not really mm-hmm. Coaching is a very different enrollment process because you're not necessarily enrolling them into you enrolling them into themselves.
Coach Ajit (23:25):
And that's the biggest hurdle you'll always cross when enrolling anybody into a personal transformation. It's not that they believe you. The biggest challenge is they don't believe themselves. What I'm really trying to reframe here for you, Jo. And for anybody that is listening right now is that don't worry so much about how will I enroll somebody into my coaching program because it makes it about you. And that's not what coaching is about, right? If you can frame this little bit differently for you and switch a narrative from how do I get somebody to believe in themselves, your energy around it will change. Right?
Jo Gillard (24:00):
Mm-hmm... I can feel it changing as you even say this it's very powerful.
Coach Ajit (24:05):
Now let's talk about the second part that you said is also concern or so I, so I remember, and so I think you said is that when you were asking for money, something seems to show up for you. Is that true? Or is that something that I just picked up unnecessarily?
Jo Gillard (24:20):
You may have recalled, uh, an earlier conversation where we did play with that. Okay. In the Certified Life Coach Q&A.
Coach Ajit (24:28):
Jo Gillard (24:29):
Um, it was, I feel like one of the challenges that I've had over the years is pricing at a point that feels comfortable for me and my skillset and giving too much space to the one voice that's going, oh, but you can see a masseuse for this. Like, why are you charging that or chiropractor or someone that actually has way, you know, way more years of training to get their qualification. And this is what their hourly rate is. And then they have coaching people, trainers on this going, that's a bug and you should be charging so much more than that. I'm like, but these are voices like my, my mother or, you know, not really like informed people on one side saying you're charged too much. And these other people that say you're not charging enough and, and finding that place, that feels good for me, that I'm actually valuing my time, my skills, the, the effort that I've put into growing my abilities in this, in this coaching business, or as a coach, rather than the business, cuz that's a separate thing really.
Jo Gillard (25:34):
And I used to get it in the way with what people think of me. But I do feel like that's shifted a little, like I think if I told you you'd still go, that's like, shit, you're you, you could charge way more than that. Like, you know, people will still say that to me. And right now I feel like what I'm charging, the three I've signed up for this year. It feels on point for me, it feels aligned. It feels great. And yeah, I'll probably increase my prices in future, but, but right now actually I feel like I found my, my point. I'm confident in what I'm charging. I feel like I can offer you used an amazing word in the training actually that I can't remember in terms of wanting to give outstanding or exceptional or for people to always walk away with this feeling that they got way more than they paid for. But there was a word used, I can't seem to remember what it was, but I found that really powerful too. And so it just feels like that price point for me actually, where I've landed feels really good. Yeah.
Coach Ajit (26:26):
Beautiful. Then we don't have to work on something that's already been worked on. And also you're so right. I am no one to tell you what you should charge. If you feel comfortable where you are at. That's awesome. And that's what you should charge for. Now, the curiosity we all will always have as human beings and you will have, it is what's more right. And we'll always keep upgrading. That's just how life is. Right. And so you will, you will upgrade whenever it is time and whenever you feel aligned. So it's perfect. And so I'm glad that that is already, that resistance has been taken away already and you feel super aligned with your pricing. You don't feel any resistance around money and so forth. Awesome top job. Is there anything else Jo, that we can work on today that will help you get to the outcome that we initially started with?.
Jo Gillard (27:12):
You know, I feel like this is something that almost feels like it's in the way and it, it is that, what is the phrase like what is my elevator pitch or what is my, that, that magic couple of lines I can say to those people that are the right resonance for what I am, what I kind of stand for. I don't, I don't wanna say it in a salesy way, but like that hooks them in. It goes, oh, I wanna know more, you know that like, oh, I'd like to hear more of what you have to say. I'd like to just know a little bit more about you and that's been evolving over years and, and it keeps shifting and changing a bit. And at the moment it's a little bit like just embraced life. And, but it's around like this, this piece of loved people, loved people.
Jo Gillard (27:56):
And when I can help people be in that state of self, love, their self compassion, reaches everybody else and we can make the world a better place. Ultimately it, it, it, the why becomes, imagine a world of harmony and unity and love, you know, that we could all enjoy and live in. And yet, somehow that feels that's the dream, right? That's the dream, that's the revolution. And it, it feels like there is something a little more succinct or concrete or tangible maybe than just, oh, we could make the world a better place. But I feel like that's what maybe gets in the way when people are like, oh, what do you do? I still actually have a tendency to say, I'm a life coach rather than I help people embrace their aliveness and enjoy the magic of life. You know, that still feels a bit wishy washy or, or I don't feel fully confident to throw that out there. You know?
Coach Ajit (28:51):
So there, there are many layers there, your questions. Right? So first layer that I, that I hear is almost like, what is the website tagline, right? Which is, which is kind of the big vision that Jo has. Let's go to that in a, in a second. The second part of it is what do I say? People that aligns people, right? So the reason why I'm separating them both is because when we speak to people, if we start from a place of what we want, they can't really wrap their head around it. Right? Your vision of the world is not where you start the conversation. That's where you find alignment in the conversation where they find camaraderie with you in, in a conversation where they feel like you are the person to talk to further in the conversation that builds a real relationship. But it's like saying before saying, hi, we start talking about our vision that happen in a conversation because a person like, hold on, let's just say first, say hi, let's get to know each other before we can talk about where you are, hope what you're hoping for the world, right?
Coach Ajit (29:50):
It's too much to even start a conversation just to kind of warm up to a new person, right? That's what if the person knows you, it's a different story. You can start from where, uh, what the vision of the world is. But when it's new conversation, we need to first be able to bring the conversation together. Now it doesn't mean that you have to start with, you know, hello, how are you? You know, how's the weather. You don't have to start there. You could start from something more meaningful. How was your day to today? Did you, did you have an exciting there? Did you have a day? Which was very busy. It's deeper than, Hey, hi. How is the weather? Right? How's the weather doesn't really build camaraderie between you and the person that you're talking to. But if you really talk about, Hey, I had a day where it was a little bit more exciting.
Coach Ajit (30:31):
I did this, this, this today. When somebody asked the question, Hey, how was your day? Instead of just saying, Hey, it was good. You actually answered the question, right? It builds a deeper meaning with the person, because one of two things will happen. The person who's not interested will walk away will be like, okay, great, good to know. And they will give you a superficial answer. Walk away. That's not your person. Anyways. Secondly, they will get interested. That's the second kind of person. The person that is interested is interested in a relationship they're interested in growth. Most likely because they finally found someone that is willing to have a meaningful conversation, not a superficial one. Right now you open the dialogue in a way where it can, it can give space for a relationship. It can create space for, for any kind of coaching relationship or other relationship.
Coach Ajit (31:16):
We don't know what the world's gonna unfold, but, but it has space. It has more depth. It has more meaning. And that's the same that once let's say, for example, if you're in a conversation, you give a deep, meaningful answer. Usually the person responds with a deep, meaningful answer. They don't try to not match your energy, right? So the reason why I'm saying the twofold solutions that you're looking for is first is when you're engaging in a conversation, you're not trying to start with your meaning and purpose. You're trying to start with a deeper conversation. That's all your intention is you're not trying to nail what you do in the perfect way, because it'll change from the context of the conversation that you've set up, right? If your context of the conversation, somebody's having an anxious day or somebody's feeling like they're really stressed out, your answer is not gonna be, I'm a life coach.
Coach Ajit (32:00):
Your answer is gonna be something like, if the question comes, what do you do? Is I help people live a less stressful life, or I help people find more purpose and meaning in their day to day work. So they can be less pressed and less anxious and be more excited about life. You're still doing the same thing that a life coach does, right? You still have all the tools to be able to help that person or another person, which may have a different direction or different challenge in life and different ambition in life. But you're not saying out of context to the conversation, you're saying in context to composition, so you don't have to know the perfect line, unless you're going to places like, for example, you need the line to open a dialogue that is deep and meaningful when you go to a thing like an event, for example.
Coach Ajit (32:39):
So for example, if I am to go on events and when I was to go on events, I would not just open any conversation. It wasn't random. It was very thoughtful of knowing, Hey, this is what this event is about. And so the people that are coming in are coming in with this intention. So if I am on a table with five other people and I wanna not have superficial conversations about, Hey, what do you do? But instead have a deep, meaningful conversation. I would open the conversation based on the context of the event. Right. But I would open a meaningful conversation. Right? I would open a conversation that would actually get them go, oh, okay. That guy has something. You know, like for example, if I'm going, sitting with entrepreneurs that do millions in revenue, guess the newer entrepreneurs that do under 5 million, their biggest challenge is all is team.
Coach Ajit (33:25):
They are a terrible team. They don't know how to do a team. They started a business. They are great as hustlers, but they have never actually thought about leadership. So I would open a conversation about leadership in a table like that. And suddenly everybody's like, hold on. This person actually has something important to say, let's hear what he has to say. Even my introduction would change just because I know what conversation I'm opening, right? So I'm opening conversations pretty much all the time. So that's what you have to think about when you are in context of your clients. Now, once you have leaned into your clients, when you've already had a conversation, now you wanna ask the question of what is my purpose and how do I explain it? And here's the honest truth. It can be as simple as you said, I wanna help a million people.
Coach Ajit (34:08):
I wanna help a thousand people live better lives. I wanna impact a billion lives. Whatever it is, it is attractive to the person because it's greater than what they ever imagined themselves doing. Right? I mean, how simple is Evercoach's statement or Mindvalley statement impact a billion lives. It's not complicated. It sounds like, whoa, what train a million coaches? That's like, what? That sounds crazy from the point of view, somebody who has never thought you could even have a million coaches in the world, right? So it doesn't have to be complicated because your vision is your vision. You just wanna find simple words to be able to say it. And somebody who's listening is excited about it anyways, because your vision is greater than what they ever thought you will have. Does that make sense, Jo?
Jo Gillard (34:49):
That really makes sense. And actually I love the way that you shared this idea of that at the end of the day, we're just opening meaningful conversations and sharing what we do in the context of that conversation. Yeah. Yeah. That's what actually has been one of the challenges. It feels kind of disjointed to sort of throw out this lofty style. This is what I do. If somebody's just like, you don't know them that well say it's at the school gate and they're like, what do you do? Like, are you the person to go into depth about my, my vision for the planet? Or I can just tell you that I'm a live coach or like, you know, this is really like low level getting to know you stuff. Uh, yeah, that was great. Thank you.
Coach Ajit (35:33):
What if you reflected - as a follow up to this conversation - what if Jo reflected and tried to explore what could be some of the openers of conversations in different contexts that you meets people? And this would be the second step to finding your system as well. Right? If your system is inviting people to a circle, the opening of the conversation changes, right? If you are, uh, system, is you reaching out to people, the opening of the conversation's gonna be different because it's different contexts that they're coming in or going to, right? So, so you wanna think about that. And the, the more you try Jo, and this is for anybody that is listening into this conversation, the more you try, the more confident you get. That's the only secret to confidence. Confidence is not a feeling. Confidence is a skill. You build that skill, like any other skill by actually practicing the skill off. You became a better coach because you practiced coaching. You became a better leader because you practiced leadership. If you're a great communicator, it's because you practice communication. If you're great at brushing your teeth, it's because you brush your teeth for many years, right? So confidence is a skill. You can acquire it whenever you're ready. And that can start today. If today is that day that you decide.
Jo Gillard (36:48):
Let that day be the day. Let today be the day.
Coach Ajit (36:49):
Thank you so much, Jo, for coming in for this conversation. Any closing thoughts that you might have?
Jo Gillard (36:56):
I feel really excited to explore prospecting.
Jo Gillard (37:04):
And, and just, I love having meaningful conversations. I actually really wanna go way beyond the weather with pretty much everyone that I ever interact with. So playing with and allowing myself to become, uh, playful and curious about how could I open conversations with different people in different ways and, and allow it to be more meaningful. Yeah. Questions. Interesting questions that aren't weird to ask people that you don't know.
Coach Ajit (37:36):
Thank you so much, Jo.
Coach Ajit (37:37):
What were some of the key ideas that you were thinking of as you were listening into this episode? How do you see your own coaching practice getting upgraded by using some of the tools that you may have learned on this episode? Think about that. And while you think about that, if you haven't yet followed us on Spotify, hit that follow button. And so you can get a notification every time we post a new episode, if you haven't subscribed on Apple podcast, go ahead and hit that subscriber. And so you get our notification every time we post a new episode. We are doing this every week for your benefit. If you haven't taken a hot minute to give us a five star rating on Spotify or on iTunes or on both, please go ahead and do that. It really helps the podcast do better every time. Thank you so much for listening in. This is Coach Ajit and you're listening to Master Coaching with Ajit.
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